So today I had one of those “swift kick to the bottom” moments. Now, to the observer it was nothing huge, but to me it hit me like a ton of bricks.
It was Ash Wednesday today. How do I know this? Well…not because I observe it, but rather because there was a little old lady who came into the tea shop I manage with a bunch of ash smeared on her forehead. Oh…and I was asked to make a “special meal” just for her, so she could enjoy a luncheon with her friends and not feel left out.
Does it sound like I have a bad attitude about it? You bet! Now, this wasn’t the only thing that got me slightly irritated. There had been a few things piling up on me, and I was getting to the end of my patience. The lady just happened to press my buttons by a few silly little requests that she was making. She was downing water like no one I’ve ever seen before. She didn’t eat the “special” sandwiches I made for her. She went on and on about how she “wished” she could try the tea because it smelled delicious. She drooled over the other lunch guest’s desserts. On and on.
Let me also take a moment to say that I truly try to make everyone feel special. I want them to walk out of my shop truly glad that they came in. I try to go the extra mile to make people feel like royalty. I strive to create a peaceful atmosphere, so people feel like they can “escape” for a little while.
Although it is my desire to do all the things I listed, after about 15 minutes of this lady, I could feel myself tensing up and not having the most attentive attitude. I had judged her as being one of “those ladies.” You know…the kind of lady that you can’t please no matter what. So, even though I was still “nice” I wasn’t giving 100%. I wasn’t putting my whole heart into serving these ladies. (No one else knew that, but I did. I knew my attitude wasn’t right.)
When it came time for the ladies to come pay and leave, my boss (the owner of the store) was at the register with me. Each one of the ladies (6 of them) made it a point to tell my boss that I was wondeful and made their time extremely enjoyable. That I was very cordial, helpful and attentive. *(Here is where I get the swift kick to the bottom feeling.) Then difficult lady looked at me and said, “thank you for the service you gave me. You made me feel like a princess, and that doesn’t happen often.”
What?!
Then it hit me.
What is her home life like?
Is she alone?
Has her husband passed away?
Do her kids take care of her?
Do they spend time with her?
Does she have anyone to talk to?
Is this her only outlet?
Does she have to be “difficult” just to get attention?
I hadn’t even stopped to ask these questions (and many more). Why? Because I was more preoccupied with my own self-centeredness. How did “I” feel? What did “I” want? How did “I” want to be treated?
Ouch.
I’m very thankful for this lesson today. I pray that I will be quicker to “ask the questions” and change my perspective then to “judge” people. Simple acts of kindness can extend beyond what we ever thought possible.
We just never know the difference we can make in the life of another.
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Powerful post Aubs. It’s so true — we never know what’s going on with other people. It’s an important lesson to remember.
Also, this was a great reminder for me to stop being so self-centered.
Thanks for sharing.
That last line said it all! Wow…great post. Thanks for sharing! I think it is something we all need to be reminded of…
I can see the point that you are trying to make. I can also understand why you were feeling annoid … (forgive my bad spelling … )
I can understand why you were feeling the way you did. In all honesty I probably would have responded in much the same way.
I guess because of this one thing …
When we fast the scriptures tell us to not say anything. Well, she was saying a lot in her complaining and in her request for something so that she didn’t want to go without so that she could enjoy her time of fellowship with other people.
I think fasting ( or celibrating lent ) is more for us then it is for God. And perhaps it’s a way we can come to see some of our character defects that perhaps need to change because they have a tendency to surface when we either fast or perhaps begin to work on being more patient and more grace filled person when dealing with difficult people.
I guess it’s a bit different when you’re dealing with customer service in which case I’d say you did a great job and perhaps beating yourself up over it might be a little too critical. I say that because customer service is all about making somebody feel special (which you strive towards ) and making somebody feel good about the service even if they’re a difficult customer. So, I say bravo to you ! seriously. I think the work that you do can be really difficult because you’re not always going to please everybody no matter how hard you work.
I totally agree with you. I think you have incredible insite.
Egads…can I have fries with my humble pie????? DANG!!! Way to testify, tell on yourself, and receive no condemnation from Jesus-only His loving correction that we ALL can benefit from. Love to you, mighty woman of God!
Marge